Who told you so, dilly dilly, Who told you so? ‘Twas my own heart, dilly dilly, That told me so.
ouch is one of the most intimate, romantic ways to be close to someone else. The Town knows this very well -- the Town wants everyone to be as close as possible.
Perhaps that's why this bonding is so...aggressive.
Because you're in for quite the shock on this otherwise peaceful day when you brush against the next person on your path.
Maybe you're going out of your way to touch people. Maybe you've got a terrible urge to just see what's lurking in someone's heart. Maybe you trip over a conveniently placed rock -- whatever the cause, you're getting an up close and personal look into someone else's heart.
Welcome to Awash's eighteenth event log, everyone! Further information on this event can be found here at the OOC post. You are welcome to make your own logs and posts for this event!
If there are any questions, please ask them here. Thank you!
[ He rises up out of his chair, walking the short distance to stand in front of Archer.
Then you? It seems like it's weighing heavily on you. Yet you believe in redemption still... in helping and protecting others. Your means to atone, maybe?
His fingers flex before he reaches his hand out to lightly rest it on top of Archer's head. ]
[ He opens his mouth to give the usual spiel about how he doesn't need to be thanked. He wants to say that he only wants Archer to take what good he's given him and return it to the world itself. Because it's embarrassing for the villain to be thanked -- does Archer want to be made fun of as a naive, goodie-goodie that didn't realize he was falling into someone's trap!? 'Course not! He's trying to help him out here.
But the way the hand rests over his own; the way that Archer looks now -- he can't do it. ]
You're welcome. [ A slight pause ] I'm certain... he was proud of you. Parents may get disappointed now and again, but they never stop feeling proud of what they raised. So, please don't worry.
[ He’s absolutely a naïve goody-goody who would walk into obvious villainous traps anyway. Why even hide it? But right now Tristan doesn’t see a villain at all—never has. What are villains but people who’ve found themselves in circumstances beyond their control? ]
Yes…perhaps you are right. [ He wants to believe it, anyway, but Heroic Spirits are just so slow to change like that. Nevertheless, he pulls his hand away from Qingqiu’s and straightens up. ]
If for such teachings alone, you are worth saving as well. [ He holds out his hand with a smile. ]
So let us return, that others may know your wisdom as well.
[ Listen! One of you has to denounce me! I know the way out of my heart, but it seems like such a shit thing, okay!? Let me forgive myself! Let me accept other's help! What sort of fucking shit is that for a villain that shoved a teenager down to suffer, suffer, and suffer?!
Shen Qingqiu is outright rebelling from what his heart wants, okay!? It's stupid! He doesn't deserve a redemption arc! He will have to be dragged through it kicking and screaming!! ]
The only way out of here is denouncing me as a person.
You really like me that much? [ That is to say, he really warmed himself up that much to Archer? He's surprised. He felt he came off very aloof and untouchable and difficult to be around with his stoic, elegant expressions and chillingly cold words. ]
Liking people too easily will get you in trouble...
Yes. I am used to that. [ I can hardly help it, he wants to say, but decides against it. Gotta let Shizun keep some of his evil overlord bluster intact.
Then he’s back to looking sad again. ]
But to speak so harshly of someone I think so highly of…that can only make things worse.
No. [ Maybe it made him feel a little queasy, but that’s about it. If almost getting killed a few times didn’t sour him on anyone’s company then nothing will. ]
But you did make me angry, when you spoke of yourself in such terrible ways.
... your kindness towards me. I don't know if I deserve it, but I also don't think it's right for it to go to waste. [ He breathes out, feeling a little defeated. ] I know how to get you out of my heart without denouncing me. But denouncing me is ... no one's done it... certainly, it couldn't hurt to try it out.
I do not want to take that risk… [ Yet, what choice did they have? ]
But if I were to escape alone, then I will do all I can to free you. You can be assured of that.
[ And well…there’s nothing left to say, is there? Except to denounce Qingqiu as a person, which is really something Tristan uncannily good at, even if he doesn’t want to admit as much.
[ Also, that's the wrong kind of admonishment, buddy! Pal! You're supposed to denounce me as a villain! I can't believe you're denouncing me against Wei Wuxian. Against Wifi! But you aren't wrong. He wouldn't have just accepted this kind of heart. He would have done something against it. I really should work on how complacent I am about things. ]
[ He snaps his fan out to cover his spasming mouth as his eyes turn to half-moons, unable to hide how funny he finds all that build up to say that much! ]
[ You know, a man really can’t help but deflate at that kind of reaction. In the first place, it’s not as if Shen Qingqiu has ever done anything particularly evil to him, so he had nothing to denounce him with.
Not to mention he’d given up the whole evil alter ego thing already so give him a break, geez!! ]
How sad…I did not wish to fail you at such a crucial moment like this.
Okay, okay. He's the one being difficult. It's hard to see Archer looking so upset and trying to do his best. Really, were you that much of an evil man in the past? I don't think so. Just one wrong path. Don't beat yourself up too much about it, ah? ]
No. I'm the one failing you. [ He breathes in deep. ] I'm going to ... forgive myself a little more. I'm going to say that it's all right to forgive myself and care about who I am. I made a mistake but wallowing forever will not make that mistake right.
[ His hands slap over his face as his heart is starting to melt around them. He hates it. He really hates he has to say those things to people. He means them, of course, but he feels so embarrassed that he is sure he's dying! ]
[ Something about Qingqiu’s words twist at Tristan’s own heart. Certain iterations of that statement had been repeated by his friends throughout his long stay here in Chroma, a number of whom have done their best to ease his perpetual melancholy.
Yes, Qingqiu is perfectly right, of course. This is a perfectly wise and reasonable thing to say from a proper shizun like him! There’s definitely a huge difference between this guy and Wei Wuxian, but Tristan isn’t thinking about differences right now.
He thinks only about the strange, disorienting sensation of having the whole world melt away around him. He’d been to Rayshifts that were less dizzying, but whatever the case, he’s…no, they’ve both succeeded in getting out of there.
And that’s what really matters, isn’t it? He glances around the occasional splatters of color about town with a sigh of relief. ]
If you have failed me, then you have more than made up for it with your wisdom. You have…given me much to think about.
Is it that I'm a huge fucking loser whose heart fucking bullies him? 'Cause I understand that being something to think about. I'd think about it and go, 'Look at that dipshit.'
Breathing in, he drops his hands away. His face is calm and dignified. ]
Thank you for finding wisdom in where I have failed. If I am able to pass on something from my mistakes, that is all this teacher can hope for. [ No one better underestimate just how great he at bullshitting away how embarrassed and mortified that he is about things. He is the king of blank faces and elegant words. ]
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Then you? It seems like it's weighing heavily on you. Yet you believe in redemption still... in helping and protecting others. Your means to atone, maybe?
His fingers flex before he reaches his hand out to lightly rest it on top of Archer's head. ]
He raised a good son.
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He reaches up to place his hand over the one patting his head. It feels…nice, in a way that he hasn’t felt in a long, long time. ]
Thank you.
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But the way the hand rests over his own; the way that Archer looks now -- he can't do it. ]
You're welcome. [ A slight pause ] I'm certain... he was proud of you. Parents may get disappointed now and again, but they never stop feeling proud of what they raised. So, please don't worry.
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Yes…perhaps you are right. [ He wants to believe it, anyway, but Heroic Spirits are just so slow to change like that. Nevertheless, he pulls his hand away from Qingqiu’s and straightens up. ]
If for such teachings alone, you are worth saving as well. [ He holds out his hand with a smile. ]
So let us return, that others may know your wisdom as well.
1/2
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Shen Qingqiu is outright rebelling from what his heart wants, okay!? It's stupid! He doesn't deserve a redemption arc! He will have to be dragged through it kicking and screaming!! ]
The only way out of here is denouncing me as a person.
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You really like me that much? [ That is to say, he really warmed himself up that much to Archer? He's surprised. He felt he came off very aloof and untouchable and difficult to be around with his stoic, elegant expressions and chillingly cold words. ]
Liking people too easily will get you in trouble...
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Yes. I am used to that. [ I can hardly help it, he wants to say, but decides against it. Gotta let Shizun keep some of his evil overlord bluster intact.
Then he’s back to looking sad again. ]
But to speak so harshly of someone I think so highly of…that can only make things worse.
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My heart covered you in rotten food. Does that not make you a little mad?
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But you did make me angry, when you spoke of yourself in such terrible ways.
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... your kindness towards me. I don't know if I deserve it, but I also don't think it's right for it to go to waste. [ He breathes out, feeling a little defeated. ] I know how to get you out of my heart without denouncing me. But denouncing me is ... no one's done it... certainly, it couldn't hurt to try it out.
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Would denouncing you…also set you free? [ He hadn’t missed the implications that Qingqiu seems focused on only trying to get him out. ]
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I can't be certain. [ No one has done it yet. ]
1/2
But if I were to escape alone, then I will do all I can to free you. You can be assured of that.
[ And well…there’s nothing left to say, is there? Except to denounce Qingqiu as a person, which is really something Tristan uncannily good at, even if he doesn’t want to admit as much.
He takes a deep breath, aaaand… ]
2/2
1/?
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5/5
[ He is laughing much louder in his own head. ]
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Not to mention he’d given up the whole evil alter ego thing already so give him a break, geez!! ]
How sad…I did not wish to fail you at such a crucial moment like this.
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Okay, okay. He's the one being difficult. It's hard to see Archer looking so upset and trying to do his best. Really, were you that much of an evil man in the past? I don't think so. Just one wrong path. Don't beat yourself up too much about it, ah? ]
No. I'm the one failing you. [ He breathes in deep. ] I'm going to ... forgive myself a little more. I'm going to say that it's all right to forgive myself and care about who I am. I made a mistake but wallowing forever will not make that mistake right.
[ His hands slap over his face as his heart is starting to melt around them. He hates it. He really hates he has to say those things to people. He means them, of course, but he feels so embarrassed that he is sure he's dying! ]
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Yes, Qingqiu is perfectly right, of course. This is a perfectly wise and reasonable thing to say from a proper shizun like him! There’s definitely a huge difference between this guy and Wei Wuxian, but Tristan isn’t thinking about differences right now.
He thinks only about the strange, disorienting sensation of having the whole world melt away around him. He’d been to Rayshifts that were less dizzying, but whatever the case, he’s…no, they’ve both succeeded in getting out of there.
And that’s what really matters, isn’t it? He glances around the occasional splatters of color about town with a sigh of relief. ]
If you have failed me, then you have more than made up for it with your wisdom. You have…given me much to think about.
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Is it that I'm a huge fucking loser whose heart fucking bullies him? 'Cause I understand that being something to think about. I'd think about it and go, 'Look at that dipshit.'
Breathing in, he drops his hands away. His face is calm and dignified. ]
Thank you for finding wisdom in where I have failed. If I am able to pass on something from my mistakes, that is all this teacher can hope for. [ No one better underestimate just how great he at bullshitting away how embarrassed and mortified that he is about things. He is the king of blank faces and elegant words. ]