awashlogs | [ OPEN? CLOSED? ] as you die, you will understand.

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[ OPEN? CLOSED? ] as you die, you will understand.

WHO: dextera + others! i’m open to anyone but please tell me by PM or at

pavaal if they haven’t had at least like, one conversation.

WHAT: dextera forces himself to face all the people he bailed on after dying.

WHERE: the town!

WHEN: forward dated to late june, and probably the 1st and 2nd of july.

WARNINGS: death death death

[ for the first time, dextera wakes up from death to a sky that isn’t red. it’s all as grey as the world around him, and slowly, the memories return to him—the bogeyman, his brother, the feeling of his very soul being taken from his body. then, there’s a long expanse of nothing. now, his consciousness has returned.

he keeps out of the way at first in this sketchy body, staying private, staying safe with a friend he’s sure won’t tell—there are things he’s not ready to talk about, and faces he’s not ready to see. after a few days have passed, though, and his features reform, color returns, and his voice continues to stay just out of reach, he can finally be seen around town again.

he saw the post. he knows guren announced his death. he’s just hoping that no one will ask about it, if they see him. ]

...

[ as ever, he's silent. ]

( i'll be posting closed prompts in the comments for people who want them, otherwise... go HOG WILD. )

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[ that… could be right. it’s his soul, after all, and he doesn’t know enough about death here. the bogeyman did suck it right out of him, and if dextera has no way of reuniting with it…

but that’s conjecture, and conjecture won’t help him here. still, he nods, and then takes a slow step forward. ]

Ichinose-san took it. [ Your soul gem is safe and in good hands, congratulations. ]

But since you came to me and not him, I assume you don't want to see him right now.

[ dextera nods again. if guren took it… that’s fine. he’ll be able to get it back later, but for now, he doesn’t want to go to guren. his hazy instinct brought him here, to the person he knows will be able to keep a level head about all of this. he doesn’t need the emotional reunion right now.

he just needs to… recuperate. he signs something again, just as uselessly as before, but the gesture itself is obvious. he points to himself, and then makes a meaningful motion at the floor.

he wants to stay. ]

[ Ryo looks at him for a moment, quietly considering whether he should let him stay or tell him once again to leave. Then he lowers the rifle to his side so it's no longer pointed in Dextera's direction. ]

You can stay. [ He turns around to head back into his room, motioning for Dextera to follow. Once inside, he closes the door behind them and leans the weapon back against the wall. ]

[ dextera exhales, but there’s no sound of breath from him. even if he moves like it, he’s been struck completely silent by this form—like a ghost, but all he can do is hope it isn’t permanent. he’d rather be dead than feel like this for the rest of his life. ]

…

[ he follows ryo into his room, and almost immediately, he leans back against the wall to slide down into a sitting position. he just wants to rest. he doesn’t know. he wants ryo to tell him what to do. ]

There's a spare bedroom you can use, but if you don't want to risk being seen by my housemate when she returns you may want to sleep in here.

[ there's a slight pause before he adds: ] On the floor.

[ he's sure he didn't really need to clarify this, but it's better to be clear so dextera knows what his options are. he isn't sharing his bed with anyone, much less some sketchy figure who gives him weird uncomfortable feelings—and maybe some vague positive ones too, because he's starting to find dextera's presence somewhat preferable to his absence. ]

Edited 2018-06-30 17:03 (UTC)

[ dextera would not expect anything different of ryo. even offering his floor is a bit of a surprise, but it’s a welcome one anyway—so he nods, and from the sitting position he’s already in, he moves to simply lie down on the floor. ]

…

[ he does turn his face up slightly to look at ryo, however, and there’s a flutter of movement that looks something like blinking eyes. slowly, his features are filling in. ]

[ Ryo notices the movement, gaze lingering on Dextera's face for a couple of seconds as though he's waiting to see if it's going to happen again. Then he turns to open the wardrobe and gather the blanket and two spare pillows he keeps there. ]

Here.

[ He holds the pillows and the blanket out for Dextera to take. One of the pillows is missing its case and is kind of flat and the other has a strange smell. But hey, better than nothing, right? ]

[ thanks, ryo.

except dextera doesn’t feel anything at all, when he takes these pillows. even the one with the strange smell just seems like it’s there, even if he does pause to sniff it because he’s still a weirdo, underneath it all. ]

…

[ he places the pillows on the ground, and pulls the blanket over his shoulders. honestly, like this, he looks just about as dead as his actual corpse did. ]

[ Don't smell the pillow, Dex!! ]

Goodnight, Dextera.

[ He was going to stay up for another hour or so to type notes on his laptop but honestly, it's getting late and the dead has come back to crash on his bedroom floor, how is he supposed to work like this. There's plenty of time to be productive tomorrow after he's gotten a good night's sleep, so he puts his laptop away and changes into pyjamas before getting into bed.

With Dextera in the room, it takes longer than usual for Ryo to fall asleep, but eventually he manages to drift off into slumber. He dreams of wings to fly with, of falling into the vastness of space from somewhere bright and warm. He stirs early in the morning, slowly blinking his eyes open. ]

[ having ryo tell him goodnight, like all this is normal or at least not completely abnormal, does get a reaction out of him. he shifts under the blanket, turning to look at ryo with that same distant focus as before—staring, as he does, until not even he can stay awake any longer.

his own dreams are of nothing at all, possibly because the sleep he does get is somehow deep and restless at the same time. he wakes up feeling worse, in some ways, but he looks better.

by the time the morning filters into ryo’s room, dextera is clearly dextera. he’s still pale, desaturated as many were during the incident with the shadows, but his body is returning to him in stages. he still feels… empty, though. he feels like someone else. ]

…

[ …right. he’s in ryo’s room. ]

[ Ryo covers his mouth with his hand to stifle a yawn and shakes his head to clear it of sleep before sliding out of bed. He's not the type to linger in bed after waking up—he's gotten his night's rest and staying there after waking up isn't conducive to having a productive day, and it makes the body associate the bed with being awake.

He looks to Dextera, mentally making the comparison to the desaturation during the shadow incident, and notes that he seems to be slowly turning back to his usual self. ]

You're looking better today.

[ dextera doesn’t notice that his body aches from sleeping on the floor until he moves to sit up, and he winces—at least, however, it’s clear on his face. there are small details that haven’t filled in yet, and he looks incomplete, but anyone who looked at him would recognize him.

he looks down at his own hands, when ryo points it out, and he’s quiet for a moment. ]

…

[ he still can’t go out like this. ]

I’m sorry. For showing up suddenly.

It's fine. People are wired to seek out familiarity, and you're the type of person who looks to others for guidance and direction.

[ Ryo assumes that's at least part of the reason he came to him, besides not wanting to see Guren right now. He begins to change out of his pyjamas and put on his usual clothes (sans the coat, since they're indoors and he can't get the bloodstains out or fix the damaged sleeve by himself), right hand smoothing the front of his shirt. ]

Besides, I owe you one. That amulet you gave me saved my life.

[ ryo is right. dextera wants direction, he can’t help it—ryo may not be an expert at providing it, but his demeanor is enough to keep dextera calm.

he looks up when ryo claims the need to repay him, however, and only upon looking closer does he realize that there are still small scratches across ryo’s otherwise flawless skin. he frowns. what happened, after dextera died? ]

Were you hurt?

I was flung through a glass window.

[ Which kind of sucked tbh, but at least Josuke took care of the worst of the cuts, and now his own healing factor has ensured that all that's left of his remaining injuries are thin lines that will disappear completely before the day is over. ]

The impact with the wall should have broken my neck. [ Or the glass shards should have severed an artery, made him bleed out. ] It didn't.

[ hearing that gets the first open display of emotion on dextera’s face since he showed up here, but even that seems subdued. his eyes widen slightly, lips parting in surprise, but ryo is clearly fine now. whether that was the amulet or something else, dextera is glad that he handed it over.

ryo would have died without it, and that would be much worse than dextera meeting the same fate. ]

I’m relieved.

[ Ryo is glad too, because dying does not sound like a good time, even if it isn't permanent. ]

I'm going to make breakfast. Do you drink coffee?

[ the one-two punch of worrying about ryo and then having ryo offer him sustenance is almost too much. this, at least, is not something the archangel would ever do for him.

dextera would frankly drink poison if ryo gave it to him in a cup and told him to take it. ]

…I don’t know. [ a helpless little shake of his head, as he watches ryo, which is his way of saying that he doesn’t remember if he’s ever had coffee before. ]

[ that moment when satan is nicer than the archangel... ]

I see. [ that usual disinterest of his is seeping into his voice and without saying else, he turns to leave the bedroom. he knows what dextera means; he was in that position when he was younger, when akira asked him if liked shaved ice and all he could do was shrug his shoulders.

he debates whether to give dextera some room temperature water instead of potentially wasting coffee beans on someone who won't appreciate it, but eventually settles on making coffee for the both of them while preparing breakfast.

a little later, he reappears in the doorway. ]

Breakfast's ready.

[ luckily for dextera, kaoru has slipped away to spend time with shiho, and there’s no harm in him stepping out of ryo’s room to try to eat something, to drink the coffee that’s wafting through the open door.

he picks himself up off the ground, and follows ryo. ]

Thank you.

Don't mention it.

[ he leads dextera into the kitchen where breakfast is waiting for them—it's nothing complicated and consists of fruit, red snapper, and coffee. the coffee has a pleasant floral aroma, but tastes a tad too bitter since he doesn't have a coffee machine here and jenny usually handles the coffee for him, so he hasn't nailed the art of brewing coffee correctly. there are sweet and fruity flavor notes amid that bitterness, though.

he takes a seat and starts by bringing his cup of coffee to his lips. ]

Finca El Injerto is one of the most expensive coffees in the world.

[ dextera looks over the food, and really, if he eats anything it’s going to be the fruit. he’s not especially hungry this morning, though—death has taken a toll on his appetite, which is usually surprisingly vast for the type of person he seems to be. ]

…?

[ he mirrors ryo by lifting the coffee cup as well, but he sniffs it first—it smells delicious, and there’s just the slightest darkening of his body, most obvious in his hair. from the scent alone, some color has returned. it’s sweet, almost like caramel, and dextera would like to taste it… but he’s following ryo’s lead here. ]

[ ryo blows on the liquid to cool it, watching the ripples chase across the surface before taking the first sip. ]

It's bitter. [ ...just letting dextera know so he's aware of this. ] I'm not very good at making coffee—I usually leave that to my secretary.

[ bless him.

dextera takes a sip as well, and he tenses—even with ryo’s warning, he expected something sweet, but the aftertaste… is actually nice. he can tell what it’s supposed to taste like, or what it would taste like with a more skilled hand.

even so, this kind of thing humanizes ryo, and with dextera feeling the way he does, there’s a mostly polite underreaction to the less-than-perfect preparation. he shakes his head, setting the cup on the table. ]

My first time. [ so… ] It’s “normal.”

[ not knowing anything else, for him, this is what coffee tastes like—whether it’s well-done or not, he wouldn’t be able to tell if ryo hadn’t told him. ]

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apocalypticist - 2018-07-04 20:26 (UTC) - Expand

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passio - 2018-07-05 13:03 (UTC) - Expand

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