awashlogs | You know you can't quit until it's won

Entry tags:

You know you can't quit until it's won

Who: Prompto Argentum and open!
Where: i. Bluohaus, ii. variously around Chroma, iii. heading into the forest, iv. Flavo
When: First half of June
What: Punishments, presents, positivity, and pquests!
Warnings: Illusory animal injury, will warn for FFXV spoilers and additional warning-worthy content in threads as necessary.

i. Bluohaus, beginning of punishment week

[It's a new day. The house is full, no one is missing, friends and lovers have been reunited, and a distressed wail breaks the quiet of the morning.]

Oh no!

[Some more dismayed noises and a couple stumbles later, the door to the Eos boys' room slams open. A bedheaded, barefoot, blatantly distressed Prompto stands in the threshold with a chicken-sized, confused and sleepily cheeping baby bird in his arms.]

Ignis! I need all our potions, stat!

ii. Out and about Chroma, punishment week

[Now aware that his favorite not-really-housepets are not, in fact, bleeding and dying everywhere, Prompto's just trying to go about some chores and further familiarize himself with the city to get his mind off it. It's hard, though, when he keeps flinching and closing his eyes whenever he sees an animal.

Oooooor maybe he'll just whimper, cover his face, and press his forehead against a wall. That's fine and normal, right?]

iii. Edge of town, post-punishment, ShEEEEEEEEEPPPPPP

[And now, for something completely different.

After advertising his availability as a yellow for the invisisheep quest, Prompto can be found between the town and the forest, gathering dust up into little cloth bundles and disappearing them into some space unseen.]

Too bad Gladio isn't here. I bet he knows how to track a sheep from its, uh. Tracks.

iv. Flavo

[It's a new day. The house is--well, as empty or full as it should be, you know your living situation better than I do. Friends and lovers are doing what friends and lovers do, no animals appear to be under undue stress, and there's no reason for any wailing to cut through the morning peace--]

Oh no! Aw, crap!

[A window in an abandoned Flavo cottage slams open. Prompto leans out of it, coughing and waving smoke out through it, then reaches down, deposits his fluffy chocobo baby carefully outside, and withdraws to take care of whatever's burning in there.]

Don't worry, baby, I got it! Just wait out there for Daddy Prompto to put out the bad fire, okay?

[So, that's happening. The little thing kwehs high and loud as single father Prompto tries to save his bacon.]

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Because I don't see it.

[He tries not to wince, inwardly, as the explanation leaves his mouth. Funny how these days, he notices every single time he uses the verb see, and how it always sounds so ironic when it falls from his lips.]

It doesn't look injured in the slightest, to me. It's just a healthy...ah, somewhat irritable, chocobo chick. To my eyes, at least.

[He hesitates.]

And you said that Spot and Aurorean were the same way?

[Despite the chocobo's frustration, Prompto keeps petting and petting it, like he needs the confirmation it's really okay repeated a thousand times before he can believe it.]

Yeah. Yeah, they were--I thought something must have attacked them. But, if the chick's okay, then they must be, too?

[It should be a statement, but hope makes a question out of many things.]

It would stand to reason. Do you want me to go check on them?

[Which would involve, you know, getting up and actually accepting that he's just plain awake and never getting back to sleep this morning — and for Prompto, he is absolutely willing to make that sacrifice.]

I'll go right now. Or we can go together, and you can touch them, if you need to.

[Prompto's silent for a while. Without speaking, he slides his free hand down to the chick's chest to feel the steady rhythm of its breathing. His petting finally slows, though it doesn't quite stop. The chick sinks into its puffed feathers and seems resigned to it, possibly sleepy once more.

Eventually, he breathes out.]

I--I can go. It's okay.

[He rubs his fingers together once more, as if really, really checking, and even dares crack open one eye to peek at them. They don't look bloody, either. Braver, he starts to lift his gaze to the chick itself once more, but aborts the motion as quickly as it starts, shaking his head with his eyes squeezed shut.]

Sorry for waking you up for nothing, Iggy. I-I'm sure Spot and Rorie are fine, if it's just me.

It was hardly for nothing.

[Though he does take that as his cue to put the potion away, back in the armiger where it belongs with a shatter of blue-white light.]

For one thing, you've still not told me where your little friend came from. Don't tell me we've had someone lay an egg that I wasn't aware of.

Ummm, no, I would've noticed that.

[The terror-spike of adrenaline ebbs away and Prompto ends up kneeling next to Ignis's bed so he can keep blindly petting the baby.]

I made a wish, I guess? And then it was waiting for me when I went to check on the chocobos. But they were all... I still don't understand why they look like this to me.

Oh, with those coins? I've seen people with those.

[Hmmmm.]

I wonder. Perhaps the wish-granter is a fickle thing, and gave you what you wanted, along with a penalty of sorts.

...You don't think it's permanent, do you?

Thus far, nothing has been. The furniture eventually ceased, as did the shadows, as did whatever force had us split up just recently. I have to believe that this, too, will pass.

[Hopefully.]

It's simply a matter of time.

[Prompto nods, holding onto that. After a moment, though, he asks:]

Theeee furniture?

Early on. The first quest of ours, I believe, was to clean up the town — and if we didn't, the furniture would yell condemnations at us.

[He pauses, gaze going faraway for the briefest of moments.]

It knew our secrets. The sort of things each of us wouldn't want overheard by anyone else.

...Oh.

[That one lands deep inside Prompto like a drop of water in a still pool, sending ripples out to his edges. The sorts of things we wouldn't want anyone else to know.

Something about Ignis keeps him from laughing it off, blustering too brightly about how it's a good thing none of them have any secrets, spending so much time in close quarters. Or maybe it's something about Prompto, now, after Zegnautus Keep. After telling them.]

I'm. Glad I missed that. ...You guys got through it okay, right?

...It's never easy to have one's insecurities exposed. Even in the presence of people who would never dream of holding them against you.

[He fiddles idly with the blankets, watching the chocobo chick a minute, then shifts and moves it a little so that the sight of it is partially obscured behind the positioning of his legs — a slight little correction designed to help make it just marginally less visible to a stray glance.]

Noct seemed to contend with his own well enough, which...only suggests that he's thought about them on his own often enough that hearing them again like that didn't do much to affect him. He seemed more upset by the ones that targeted me, than himself.

Yeah. He's like that.

[Always thinking of others first, genuinely, not because he needs to please people or earn his place in the world but because he's good. Because it's right.

Prompto thinks about that as he stares at the bed, then tilts his head slightly.]

And you? Were you okay?

[Because while Noct may be the type to dwell on his insecurities, Prompto can't even imagine Ignis engaged in that kind of practice.]

Edited 2018-06-09 00:39 (UTC)

[The fact that he goes quiet for what feels like a long time, rather than having an answer at the ready, is probably more than enough answer in and of itself.]

I...had led Noct to believe that I remembered less than I really did. For him, it was still the day before the ceremony, but I remembered what transpired the day of. The...losses, suffered.

[He doesn't say her name. It's Prompto; he doubts he has to.]

I thought it was another means of protecting him, to maintain that slight falsehood. But the furniture exposed me.

...

[For once, Prompto doesn't shoot straight to comfort. He doesn't say it's okay.]

It's the same thing His Majesty did to him. Remember? When we got the first Royal Arm.

['Entrusted it to me? Why didn't he tell me that? Why did he stand there smiling as I left?'

Prompto folds his arms on the mattress and rests his head on his elbow.]

It's harder for him, when people do that stuff for him. If you'd done it to protect yourself, he wouldn't even have blinked. ...But I guess you'd never.

Yes, Prompto, I'm fully aware. You might recall I was there.

[But almost as soon as the terse words are out of his mouth, he bites them off, ducking his head as he pulls his glasses off and rubs at his eyes.]

My decision was made in a split-second, in a fit of panic, because the last thing I remembered was Chancellor Izunia badgering me to abandon Noctis and follow him, and the next thing I knew I was in the well, separated from Noct entirely. I'm aware it was a poor decision. Desperate circumstances often lead to irrational and ill-conceived choices.

[He presses his lips together, sighing through his nose.]

I didn't want him to have to live with that knowledge. That's all. I wanted to bear it for him, so he wouldn't have to.

[He lifts his head again, studying Ignis's face, and then sits up.]

Ignis, you don't have to do that. What you just did. You don't have to... hold it in like that on my account, I can take it if you're annoyed with me. I just...

[Words are tough to come by. Prompto laces his fingers together and pulls them apart again, presses his fingers tip to tip, one by one, trying to wrestle nameless feelings into something he can express.]

You never told us that, either. Me and Gladio, at least, after we found you--you never told us that Ardyn tried to get you to turn on Noct. Of course we know you won't. [He says that quickly, as if Ignis could ever believe his loyalty would ever be in doubt. No. Never.

But his gaze slips down, away, as does his chin.]

Are you always doing that? Keeping secrets so you won't hurt us? ...Or Noct?

[Noctis is going to die.

Noctis is going to die, he's going to die, Noct is going to die, he has to die they've called him to die they've made it his destiny to die he'll go to the throne of the Lucii and die, he'll die, for the whole world he'll die, for the sake of the world he'll die, he's going to die, Noct is going to die, his Noctis is going to die —]

...Everyone is entitled to their secrets, Prompto.

[he'sgoingtodiehe'sgoingtodiehe'sgoingtodiehe'sgoingtodie]

And my annoyance isn't directed at you. That's why it wouldn't be fair of me to take it out on you.

[Prompto isn't good with people the way Gladio is. He's not super smart like Ignis. He's nowhere near as effortlessly good as Noct. All he is is nots, tied up in them too tight to unknit.

But they came for him anyway. They brought him out of the dark and told him he was one of them, as long as he'd rather not be anywhere else.

How can he offer Ignis that same most important thing?]

I don't... If it's something like--You know we wouldn't...

[None of them sound right, and with Ignis you have to get your words just right. Even if Prompto's the sharpshooter, he doesn't know how to get precision like Iggy's. He can only stumble like a clumsy child and hope at least it's in the right direction.]

You're always taking care of us, Iggy. So I want... If there's anything you need help carrying, I want to be there. Because you've always been there for us. That's what friends do. Even if it's little like being annoyed at something that may or may not be me, you shouldn't bear that by yourself. I... I'm here. I want to hear it. You know?

[The unfair part of it all, really, is that he can't even argue against what Prompto is suggesting — not on the heels of his own assertion of wanting to do the exact same thing for Noct's benefit. It's one or the other; either burdens ought to be shared or they shouldn't, but he can't play it both ways.

More and more, he's finding himself in that situation lately. Situations where it's one thing if it's Noct, but quite another if it's himself.]

I worry about him. Every time he hears of another thing that's gone wrong, he takes it all on himself. Insomnia. His Majesty. Lunafreya. Now, apparently, myself and you —

[He sucks a sharp breath, admitting that. It's hard, every time he remembers that Prompto was almost certainly abducted because of him, and that he himself had evidently been just moments away from being blinded by Ardyn Izunia.]

The Marshal was wrong, to demand so much of him so soon. They all demand so much of him...everything demands so damned much of him...

[It's one thing to think that himself, all these years. It's another to hear it from one of Noct's People, from Ignis, from the man who demands everything in the world be as he wants it and demands even more from himself, who's always made sure Noct is capable of doing exactly what he's born to do.

It's one thing to think that, as the normal guy Noct's always wished he could be. It's another to hear the keeper of Noct's kingly destiny himself say it with such vehemence. Prompto barely breathes his answer.]

...Yeah.

[He used to think Ignis demanded too much of him, back in high school. He used to think that, and then he got to know Ignis better. Then he stood with him in Fociaugh Hollow and heard him tell Gladio to step off.]

Yeah. But those people... they've all always... [He seesaws on his answer, gnawing nervously on his lower lip, and then finally lets it out, as he eventually always does.] ...They've all always decided what's best for him, too. Without letting him choose.

I genuinely don't know if you're saying that as a mere point of discussion, or as a continued condemnation of my choices. If it's the latter, you may as well just come out and say it.

[It's not as standoffish a remark as it could be, under different circumstances, but a touch of that terseness is back in his tone nevertheless.]

You know as well as I do that Noct doesn't make his decisions based on what's best for himself.

[Prompto looks at Ignis, then, and then shakes his head.]

No, I don't mean... Well, maybe a little? I just...

[He just finds it hard to go back in time, now, to when he still thought Ignis was unbreakable. He can't shake the intervening weeks of being there to help him, to catch him--of the three of them, Prompto was there.

He knows Ignis takes his pain and his secrets and ties them neatly shut, seals them away, never lets anyone see--unless he can't see their seeing, can't know how to hide it. And it bothers him now. And it bothers him, that Noct's gone so long with everyone he loves keeping things from him, has endured blow after blow until finally it was Prompto's turn and Noct just. Accepted it, like.

Like a king.

Prompto stops kneeling on the floor and sits, slowly and heavily, on the edge of Ignis's bed instead, looking down at the floor instead of at the now-snoozing chocobo or his friend, considerately hiding it from view.]

You told Gladio to lay off him, after Altissia. Things were--Gladio was being a dick. [And Prompto never did get to throw down with him about it; it's probably just as well, since he weighs about as much as Gladio's forearm, but he never did hear an apology of his own.] The things you said, I know no one trusts or believes in Noct more than you do.

I just... I know. What it's like to be kept in the dark about something. Something--something important about yourself that hurts to know, but not knowing just makes you feel... stupid. And lied to, and scared. And... I know what it's like to keep a secret from everyone you care about, too. And I just think... maybe I'm tired of it. And tired of seeing everyone hurt by it.

[He stops wringing his hands to look up.]

We're friends. We'll stand by each other, always. Even the worst, hardest things, if we work it out together, we always come up with something. ...That's how I feel, anyway.

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You know you can't quit until it's won

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