[open] PADORU PADORU (aka: bad caroling)

[neronian]

WHO: Nero (neronian), Wei Wuxian (espritdecorpse), Tristan (noholdsbard), and whichever poor souls will be subject to this racket (aka you!)
WHERE: All over the town!
WHEN: December.
WHAT: Questing. Well, one quest in particular: going caroling with someone. An emperor, a necromancer, and a Knight of the Round Table all go caroling. Being Tristan is suffering.
WARNINGS: Nothing, save for Nero's bad singing voice, probably.

[ Courtesy of Nero and Wei Wuxian's whims, and the elves for delivering (yes, delivering) Tristan to her and her roommate so aptly and quickly, it begins. The eccentric entourage begin their caroling journey all throughout Chroma, from Ruga, to Bluo, to even Flavo, if they don't get too tired and nobody tries to run away. Nero sidles up to the residences, peering into the windows (when she can, she's a short one, you see) to check if someone's home.

If the lights are on, or she hears movement and activity inside, she saunters up to the door and raps one of her gloved fists against it, giving it a few hearty knocks. One, two, three firm and loud knocks! ]

Hello?

[ Should the occupant open the door, they will see a group of 3: Nero, short and clad in red, Wei Wuxian, a tall man who seems to have a flute in hand, and Tristan, another tall man who seems to have a bow-harp of sorts, and is looking pretty much utterly despondent and sad, but he always looks like that, so don't mind him. ]

Comments

closed to wei wuxian; pre-caroling

[neronian]

[ Nero steps out into their living room, both hands on her hips, with a bright smile on her face. She is dressed in a warm ensemble of even more red than she wears normally, although she does not have a Santa hat to complement the red coat and boots she found and claimed for this outfit. A shame. But she will live. The emperor in red addresses her roomiest of roommates somewhat loudly, but mostly proudly. ]

Wei Wuxian! It is December, and also snowing! [ She points to outside the window, where a rather light flurry is falling. ] Do you know what this means?

[ There has been some hubbub around the town. The new quests were posted, and there seemed to be tricky little buggers sneaking around and about. But the latter were not what Nero cared about, for she could fend them off easily if needed. No, it was December, and that meant Christmas.

(Do not point out the irony of Nero Claudius of all people celebrating a Christian holiday.)

And Christmas (along with one of the quests posted on the forum) meant... ]

[espritdecorpse]

[ He startles a little at being addressed like that and glances up from his laptop. ]

Ah...

[ She looks just enchanting dressed in red like that and he can't help smiling. ]

It means you're going to go out and make snow sculptures again?

[ He totally saw what she was working on, back at the ice castle. That kind of thing warmed everyone's... heart, or something. ]

[neronian]

[ Not the only thing those warmed...but she'll let it slide. Nero shakes her head. ]

Not this time. No, I shall express my artistic genius another way. It's the season for caroling, you see!

[ Does he even know what caroling is? ]

[espritdecorpse]

Oh! Right, right.

[ He nods for a few moments and falls quiet.

...

Okay, fine. ]

Tell me, maiden Nero. What's caroling? Is it something to eat?

[neronian]

First of all, you are to refer to me as Saber. Not Nero.

[ She's most likely told him that already, but well, it's Wei Wuxian and who knows how much he tries to stick to what people tell him. If he tries to pull that around anyone not in the know about her true name however, she'll just. Put a hand on his mouth when necessary.

And he probably comes from a land where there isn't caroling, most likely, but she doesn't mind explaining that part. ]

Second, caroling is when groups of people go around and sing holiday songs and hymns together. Usually Christmas songs! Have you never partaken in such activities?

1/2

[espritdecorpse]

[ ... ]

[organfarm]

[ Jion sure is at home, taking a short break from his self-imposed mission of getting better at sewing, and he's in the kitchen when he hears the knock at the door. ]

Uh, coming! [ Mug of hot not-quite-tea in hand, he trots over to the door and opens it wide without a second thought. ] Hey, what's -- ... up?

[ This certainly is a ... curious trio? Jion blinks, clearly confused, because he sure can't figure out the theme here. ]

Um, can I help you guys with something?

[espritdecorpse]

Ah. Haha. S-singing.

[ He stands up and starts to back away. ]

I don't... I'm afraid I don't know any, er, "Christmas" songs, Maiden Ner—Saber. So you'll have to go around without me. Besides! I just told somebody I'd draw him a picture of a beautiful lady, so I'd better get on that right away. Oh heavens, now i've got to find a model. Hmm, I wonder where I could find one?

[ He scratches his chin, making a theatrical show of thinking. With any luck, he'll be able to play upon her vanity and distract her from........... the singing. ]

[espritdecorpse]

"You guys"! Is that any way to greet your master? Call me Shizun!

[ Regardless of what you think kid, you're his disciple, and don't you forget it! ]

Anyway! We're here to wish you a Merrrrrrry—

[ ...



He turns back to his compatriots. ]

Hang on, what's this merry thing we're wishing again?

[noholdsbard]

It is Christmas. [ He sighs a very longsuffering sigh, as he’s already tuning his harp in the background. ]

My poor young friend, it is truly a pity that we must meet again like this… [ Hope you’ve got earplugs on, Jion, because this isn’t going to end well for either you or Tristan. ]

[neronian]

[ Nero is, of course, completely oblivious to the imminent terror, or Tristan's obvious suffering. Or perhaps she is cognizant of it, but twists it in a way such that it cannot possibly break her delusions. Either way, Nero nods, silently taking in the fact that Wei Wuxian has a disciple??? You learn something new every day. ]

It is still too early for Christmas itself, we know, but that does not mean it's not the season for caroling!

[ Also the quest was posted, but Nero cares way less about that than showing off her "talent". ]

[neronian]

[ She is about to interject and insist that she can teach him some (wrong) Christmas songs before he says something else that piques her interest. Did someone say...art??? Model??? Beautiful lady??? ]

There is one right in front of you, you know. If it is for the sake of art...w-well, I suppose I could sneak in a modeling session for you. It would not be the first time I have done such a thing. [ Commissioning statues and paintings of herself... ] Besides, there is a stunning lack of beauty in this town.

[ His plan...somewhat works. On one hand, she's sufficiently distracted by the thought of modeling for someone's art. On the other...she still hasn't forgotten!! The caroling (quest) of utmost importance!!! ]

[espritdecorpse]

Oh! You're right, of course! With graces granted by heaven, not to be concealed...

[ He's delighted. Piercing two hawks with one arrow! He'll be able to draw a picture for his wine-making pursuits, and he's distracted her from singing. ]

Er.... speaking of concealment. Your attire is lovely, but for the purposes of art it obscures your true beauty.

[ Is he pushing his luck here? One way to find out... ]

[inheritance]

[If anyone comes knocking at his door, Izuku's always going to open it... which is why he's left blinking a little in surprise when he sees who's actually standing there.]

Hi. [Nonetheless, the three of them get a friendly grin anyway.] Did you need help with something?

[espritdecorpse]

Hiiii!

[ He could stand there and suffer, like poor Archer is doing. Or, he could own this in all its horrible majesty. He spreads his arms wide, grinning from ear to ear. ]

We're here to offer you an unforgettable experience! You'll be at a loss for words. This I absolutely guarantee!

[ Well.... he's not lying. ]

I'm Wei Wuxian, and these are my very esteemed fellow artists, Brother Archer and Maiden Ne— I mean, Saber! Maiden Saber!

[ He makes an excessively formal fist-in-palm salute. ]

[scooptimistic]

[ The door swings open rather quickly, Maya blinking at the trio and... offering a slightly confused smile? Well, she knows Archer, she's still not sure she'll ever be able to get rid of a naked Wei Wuxian in her mind, but the woman's entirely new. ]

Hi?

[neronian]

[ Only for a short time!! Nero is a lot of things, flighty and whimsical, true, but she (thinks she) has an artist's soul, and will not give up so easily when it comes to displaying her "talents". Nevertheless, Nero takes his comment in stride. Is he fortunate to have a roommate who is utterly unashamed of her body and used to being basically-nude a bunch of time anyway? Perhaps.

She nods, and slips off her coat. The request isn't a strange one to her. In fact, she's probably walked around in her underwear several times already. ]

Ah, you are trying to depict the the human form? Yes, I understand well. It was the subject of many a sculpture from the artists of my empire.

[espritdecorpse]

Oh! Maiden Maya! Haven't seen you since...

[ If he had an ounce of shame, he'd be embarrassed to be meeting her like this. But he doesn't, so he's not. ]

Well, don't worry—I'm dressed warmly and I intend to stay that way! Haha! No, we're here to sing you some Christmas carols! Do you know what Christmas is? It was new to me!

[espritdecorpse]

The "human form"? Not as such. I'm trying to draw a goddess.

[ He's had some brief glances at her human form; it was enough to make him sorry there were no temples here to pray at, nor incense to offer the gods for his good fortune.

Ah, her coat's off. Good, good. ]

That's much better! Although—I fear your dress, while lovely, is more befitting of a mortal lady. A royal lady, to be sure, but not a deity. If I might be so bold, I think I might have a better chance of capturing your divine beauty without it in the way.

[ He's laying on the flattery with a trowel; but if he's successful, he'll have something for his sketch portfolio and a memory he'll cherish his whole life. ]

[pyrafect]

[ It just so happens that she knows two of the three, so opening the door to them is quite the pleasant surprise. And, actually, it is a pleasant surprise to even meet a stranger like the blonde woman standing just at the door. She smiles towards Nero first, welcoming and kind, and then towards the other two men she happens to recognize.]

...Is there something I can help the three of you with?

[noholdsbard]

[ If Tristan isn’t already deeply concerned by this strange turn of events, he is now upon hearing some very familiar voices inside this house he’s being snuck into—as much as Santa’s little helpers are capable of sneaking around, anyway.

Which they aren’t. Not with their tiny little footsteps and merry little voices, but oh, they do try. He has to give them credit for that. Trying one’s best is all one could hope for during the holiday season…

Which is why a bedecked and beribboned Tristan is unceremoniously deposited at their feet at that very moment, entirely bound and gagged and looking more despondent than ever when he catches her trying to!! undress!!!!!! right in front of him, before the elves make their hasty exit from the premises.

He lies there, keeping his eyes to the ground, hoping it might swallow him up at that very moment because even for a man sworn to chivalry he really can’t save Nero from herself. ]

[noholdsbard]

[ Tristan turns to Wuxian, his eyes flying open in surprise. Did he just hear right? Did this guy somehow figure out her True Name already? Her true identity, and one of the most jealously guarded secrets among mages?!

Wei Wuxian you are so lucky they’re not currently in a Holy Grail War right now.

He turns to Izuku with an effort. Sorry kiddo, you’re not getting any holiday cheer from this guy. ]

Yes, Saber. Ah, she is truly one of the most generous spirits residing within this town….for better or worse.

[ Please take this warning AND SLAM THE DOOR IN THEIR FACES RIGHT NOW… ]

[noholdsbard]

[ Why does Nero keep picking the houses where his friends live!!! Much as Tristan would love to spare the entire town, this is just too much…! ]

Forgive us for disturbing you, Maya. My colleague Saber wishes to spread some holiday cheer, though we certainly understand if you are much too busy.

[ Please be busy. PLEASE SAVE YOURSELF MAYA… ]

[espritdecorpse]

Pyra! I d-didn't know you lived here! How are you! Hello!

[ Which means of course they've been knocking on random people's doors all night. ]

Ah... we're here to... to just say hello to people! And, er, do you know Archer, here? This is Maiden Ne— Saber, she's... [ my roommate ] ...a friend of Archer's, too!

[ Running around assaulting people's ears is good fun when you don't care what anyone thinks, but for some bizarre reason he can't name, he'd rather not make a fool of himself in front of Pyra. ]

[noholdsbard]

[ Wuxian’s approach to her is indeed strange, though it’s not one he can comment on at the moment. Pyra is also a friend he’d rather not subject to the cruel and unusual punishment of Nero’s can-only-be-very-generously-termed-as-singing…! ]

Well met, Miss Pyra. It is a shame that we cannot seem to meet under more fortunate circumstances…

[ With this ominous warning, he has to turn his gaze away from her. Poor Pyra! Please forgive him!! ]